Yep, you are ugly. You woke up this morning and took one look at yourself and know that you are ugly. I thought (since you said it first) I would share a few muddled thoughts I was having on this very topic as I rolled out of bed this morning.
As I get older, I take more time with my appearance most days. I wear makeup most days. I find fault with my myself most days.
You too? Oh great, we will get along just fine. You have cellulite on the FRONT of your thighs? Awesome, me too. Your hair is fabulous when you don't need to go anywhere or see anyone, but goes haywire when you want to feel pretty? Yup, me too. You yell at your kids when they are just being kids but happen to get on your very last nerve with their high pitched 'puppy' barking? Yep.
Ugly comes in a lot of different ways. We usually focus on the face and body, but ugly sneaks out of our personalities too. That might be the hardest to admit. Everyone is Ugly, Some Just Hide it Better! Good looking parents, expensive clothes or beauty products, dimmer lights...whatever the lovely folks have that you don't simply hides what we all have: ugly. Some people hide their inner ugly by leaving a situation before it shows. Or counting to ten verrrrry slowly. I am teaching my little girls to take deep 'yoga breaths' and count to ten when they are upset. I want them to be able to learn things I didn't about leaving their ugly hidden when possible.
It isn't always possible to hide your ugly. I HAD to spend some time with one of my favorite folks this week. I missed her so. And thus we squeezed in a quick play/lunch date right after I worked out. Folks, I was UGLY. I smelled bad and wore my lycra shorts over there. Those suckers don't go ANYWHERE but the gym and thru the 'hood on runs. But I needed my friend, so I showed her my ugly. She was pretty enough to say she couldn't even smell me.
Be sure to find or make friends who will see that you are ugly but won't admit it. Or if they do, they help freshen you a bit! And it is ok for your ugly to show. Your friendships will deepen when you are authentic about how you feel...inside and outside. When you are real about your own struggles, you give people around you the freedom to share their struggles too. Somebody may need that permission more than you know.
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| Dale Chihuly Exhibit Indianpolis Children's Museum |
I have some things I do, for when I am UGLY. I'd like to hear what you do too!
1) Ask God to remind me of my beauty, and then get outside in nature!
2) Do something with my body; exercise, cuddle my girls and read, drink a smoothie or juice veggies, shower and primp a bit.
3) Put on bright red lipstick. Even with a bathrobe.
4) Call or write to a friend telling them about their beauty and how they bless my life.
5) Read great books like Captivating by John & Stasi Eldridge, Made to Crave by Lysa Terkhurst or something else that gives me a point to start over with how I see myself.
6) Paint some TRUTH CARDS from Brave Girls Club to encourage another woman.
7) Eat something. Sorry, shouldn't be here, right, but it is true. Cheese popcorn, Unreal Candy, OH! How you make me feel lovely.
8) Get thankful. This trick has been an oldie but a goodie. I write down or speak out loud every little silly thing I am grateful for, from hot coffee to a cushy seat to sit on while I'm sulking. IT WORKS EVERY TIME.
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| Sign in a store i heart! |
9) Pray for others who do not have the luxury of worrying about cellulite or wrinkles. I give thanks I have a blessed life full of family, good health, intelligence, beauty and freedom. Any second everything could change and I could see how pitiful my small vain woes truly are.
10) SMILE! Your brain and body do not know the difference between real happiness and a forced smile. Start smiling at others, but especially yourself in the mirror, and you will see your beauty.
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| from Brave Girls Club |
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